Some Oldies, but goodies.
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink, I feel shame. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." Jack Handy (Warning - the consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that your are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.)
"I fell sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day." Frank Sinatra (Warning - the consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.)
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." Henny Youngman (Warning - the consumption of alcohol may lead you to think that people are laughing WITH you.)
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's get drunk and go to heaven!" Brian O'Rourke (Warning - the consumption of alcohol may cause you to think that you can sing.)
